Hi everyone;

It’s been a while now…not sure how long.  If you didn’t already know, I’ve been a little busy.  Oh, before I go on too long, welcome to those of you who have no idea why you received this email!  HA!  I send these little blurbs out every now and then and let people read what’s on my mind.

I think the last time I wrote, I wrote about the idea of forgiving ourselves.  Last week, an old friend of my sister and brother-in-law’s unexpectedly passed away.  My brother-in-law put together a heck of an email reminding everyone of the importance of forgiveness – forgiveness from God, forgiveness of ourselves, and forgiveness between people.  It was touching to say the least, but the pain of years of neglect was certainly taking its toll on him.  Those who know me well, know I’m forever grateful to Rick for stepping in when my Dad died – and nothing he chooses to do or not do will ever take away from that.

The thought crossed my mind about forgiveness like that…of words not spoken that would so easily have bridged the gap, no matter how wide.  But pain has to go with it…that is to say, the pains that helped glue those grudges in place – they’ve got to go away…don’t they?  Does forgiveness guarantee the removal of pain?  Should it?  I’ll raise my hand and tell you quite frankly, I’m not that good…not yet anyway.

A dear friend, whose walk in faith I can only say is beyond most I’ve ever witnessed, recommended I read a book titled “The Pursuit of Holiness.” I’ve been using that book as a devotional for the past couple of weeks – honestly, I should’ve finished it by now, but I’ve re-read some chapters because of their impact.  I confided with my friend that the more I’ve read, the further away I feel from any real faith…especially an active faith.  We were talking the other day about the difference between being a “believer” and a “follower”.  Now, growing up, you were either a “leader” or a “follower” – which tended to say that those who were “followers” were some sort of lower class.  In the case of faith, I would tend to say that the “followers” are actually those that lead the way in faith.  To be a “follower” is to not only believe in Christ, but to follow the teachings and truly strive to be Christ-like.

The first 5 chapters of this book have set me back probably further.  I have unwound and rewound my beliefs several times the past 20 years…more so in the past 5.  I have what I like to call an “accountability partner” now and that type of relationship, with someone who understands the idea of being a follower is unbelievably enlightening.  As I read through this book, I realize why doing the things I’ve been doing (the wrong things, that is) are really keeping me from living closer to my potential…closer to the life I truly want…and closer to the happiness I so insanely seek!  Insanely?  Yes – if it’s not a word, I made it up!!!  But that defines so much as to why I’ve not found it – I’m doing the wrong things continually trying to get there.

In my work, for instance, I have associated with those who have truly burdened me.  Yes they’ve helped…but their help has handcuffed me – lulled me to sleep because of the comfort I felt as they produced more and more billable work.  The character of those you associate with will undoubtedly affect the boundaries you keep for yourself.  Does that mean we should all stay in sterile circles?  No way!  But there’s a difference in locking arms with people and ministering to them.  I have too often locked arms with those who in turn hold me back.

One such example happened to a new friend of mine, and client.  For the past 3 weeks I’ve been working diligently with a client whose business has been ransacked by a business partner who, from all appearances, has taken my client’s business from being highly successful to insolvent in a matter of months.  I believe my client to be an upstanding person…he has his issues as we all do.  But this client is living proof that locking elbows with bad associations can lead to some really bad outcomes.  As I walked out of my client’s office the other day, I noticed a paperweight on the desk that quoted Proverbs 3:5-6.  I held it up to my client with a smile and said, “we’re gonna be all right.” The paperweight only presents a portion of the quote, but here it is in its entirety: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.”

There’s been so much going on in the past 3 weeks in my life personally that I’ve failed on some levels to acknowledge everything God’s blessed me with in my life.  Nothing more poignant than tonight when I sat down to get my iTunes up to date with all the music I wanted to download.  I saw the title “Cinderella” and immediately felt a bulge in my throat.  Some tunes you need to hear to be reminded why you wanted to download it…this one…not at all.  The tune popped straight into my head even though I have only heard the song once.  I truly believe if we learn to be followers, moments like those in this song can be made so much sweeter…imagine what it would be like to not cover for so many pains – but to have them released and our lives freed to continue our walks…can you imagine that?

I have many friends on this email who are going to be hit different ways.  From my brother-in-law whose loss of a friend and recent addition of a first grandbaby, to my dear friend Tony who still struggles with the loss of a newborn, to another friend Yvonne who just watched her baby-girl graduate college, to Jessy who some of you read about in a prior email that has surgery on her brain aneurysm on 6/30 (PLEASE EVERYBODY KEEP HER IN YOUR PRAYERS), to many others of you…this song is gonna hit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g47xuzddYqM

When you come back, I pray that all of you on here will learn in your own way what it is to not only believe, but follow.

And thanks to my very dear friend for keeping me accountable,

With a smile,
Tim

***
Lyrics for “Cinderella”
As performed by Steven Curtis Chapman

She spins and she sways to whatever song plays,
Without a care in the world.
And I’m sittin’ here wearin’ the weight of the world on my shoulders.
It’s been a long day and there’s still work to do,
She’s pulling at me saying “Dad I need you!
There’s a ball at the castle and I’ve been invited and I need to practice my dancin'”
“Oh please, daddy, please!”

So I’ll dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
‘Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh I’ll dance with Cinderella
I don’t wanna miss even one song,
Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she’ll be gone

She says he’s a nice guy and I’d be impressed
She wants to know if I approve of the dress
She says “Dad, the prom is just one week away,
And I need to practice my dancin'”
“Oh please, daddy, please!”

So I’ll dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
‘Cause I know something the prince never knew
Ohh-oh ohh-oh, I’ll dance with Cinderella
I don’t wanna miss even one song,
Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she’ll be gone
She will be gone.

Well, she came home today
With a ring on her hand
Just glowin’ and tellin’ us all they had planned
She says “Dad, the wedding’s still six months away
but I need to practice my dancin'”
“Oh please, daddy please!”

So I’ll dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
‘Cause I know something the prince never knew
Ohh-oh ohh-oh, I’ll dance with Cinderella
I don’t wanna miss even one song,
(even one song)
Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she’ll be gone